A Letter to My Darlings…
As many of you will know I am an, almost entirely, positive person! I love to laugh, smile and look at the silve linings of every situation!
I purposely surround myself with positivity and walk away from negative situations and people…
Despite this, every now and again, something happens that makes you thing of a “worst case scenario”.
In my case, just thinking about my Mum is a reminder of what could happen to me and how my children will be left. My Mum became severely disabled when I was 8 and became fully bed bound, unable to speak, move or eat by the time I was 10 due to MS (Multiple Sclerosis). I’ve taken the whole experience as a valuable learning journey and use it to live my life on my terms and fill it with happiness as I’ve seen how quickly it can be whipped away!
Regardless of that, being the planner that I am, I wanted to write a letter to the 4 most important people in my life in case anything does happen to me! I felt a lot of guilt after my Mum passed away and so being a mother now myself I want my children to know there’s no need to feel any guilt what so ever…
To my dearest treasures, my 4 perfect darlings,
As I write this I’m perfectly well, the picture of health and wonderfully happy to be your energetic Mummy.
You are 13, almost 10, 7 and 3 and such wonderful little characters right now… despite a few tantrums from you all!
I want you to know that I love you all ridiculously, always have and always will, nothing will ever change that. I’m proud beyond belief of every single one of you and your own unique ways.
If I have become ill and I’m now unable to be the Mother to you all that you deserve I want you to know a few simple things…
Every time I told you I loved you, I meant it with every ounce of my being.
Every time I told you you are perfect, you better believe that you are! Absolutely perfect.
I loved every cuddle or kiss you ever gave me, they lit me up inside.
I want your visits to me to be something you want to do, not a burden, so if ever you feel you can’t come or simply don’t want to. Don’t. I understand.
If you’re worried about stressing me by coming to me with your problems because I’m ill. Don’t. I WANT to help. I WANT to listen. I’m your Mother and from the moment you were born that was the only role that mattered.
If you’ve got a party to go to instead of visiting me. Oh my gosh, my darling, go to that party! Have fun, enjoy yourself! And then when you can come, tell me all about it!
A date? Plans with friends? GO, GO, GO! I understand! I want you to be happy and have fun, enjoy your life as much as you possibly can. Take pictures and bring them to show me.
You’re tired and don’t feel like coming? Don’t. I fully understand, having an ill mother is exhausting, it takes so many emotions to come and visit. So, you rest my darling, snuggle up tight and have sweet dreams.
You don’t know what to say when you see me? That’s OK my baby, just tickle my arm, play me your new favourite song or flip through the latest pictures on your phone so I can see them. We don’t need to talk, you just being there has made my day.
Just know that you 4 are my whole world. Nothing means more to me than you. You deserve every happiness and I hope you share your journey’s with me while I’m around to listen.
I love you sweethearts, always and forever,
Now, HOPEFULLY they’ll never have to read this letter 🙂 BUT just in case, the planner in me is now satisfied.
I’m off to go snuggle those babies up! Have a great day!